My Graduation Speech II

We have fought to find internships, we lost to our visa status.
We have fought our Windows machine, but lost to code.
We have fought our kitchen, but lost to the fire alarms.
We have fought for that washer unit that takes one quarter instead of five, but lost to someone else being faster. Even on Friday nights.
We have fought for that TA/RA position, but lost to some "policies of the department".

But we never stopped fighting.

We started our research projects instead. And we again fought for full-time jobs.
We installed Ubuntu instead. Fought the thought of buying a Mac.
We opened windows to let out the smoke. And fought to learn cooking in microwave instead.
We visited the laundry building 3 times. And fought to perfectly time to get the cheaper dryer as well.
We got job at dining services instead. And fought to cut down those trips to Chipotle.

One of my teachers from high school framed an answer for the question: why learn in school things we are never going to use later in life? He said, it's only a scale of measurement.

Graduation speeches usually include tips and tricks to survive outside college, sometimes stories of survival in the world, but I don't have any of these. I only have my past experience telling me we have won, not just once, but over and over. We have given up sometimes, procrastinated more often, but never missed the deadlines. We have been successful on this reference scale - not our GPA, not the money we made; but how we never stopped working. My only tip for after college life is keep hustling. And one day, we'll figure out what we want to do with our lives.

My Graduation Speech

I read somewhere that when we are kids time moves slowly for us, and as we grow older we feel time is flying by us faster and faster. Some believe this happens because as kids our brains expand more, we experience more each day. Since then I have used time as a scale. If I look back to 2015 - I see a kid, far far away from here, in all the dimensions we can perceive.
She has since fought, and cried, laughed, and learnt. She has tried to walk in snow with heavy boots, and tried to sleep at night with a heavy heart. She has loved, lost and loved again. Then again she has won, lost and won. There have been adventures, misadventures, and missed adventures.
To add a conclusion to this chapter would be unfair.
:)

For Love

Sometimes, you have stand still for the people you love. For the sake of their peace, you have to quit the fight. Because love is not loud, it cares. So take that step back, it's okay!

Chicken or Egg?

Counter question: How do you define an egg?

Option 1: If a chick hatching out of it makes it hen's egg, it was the egg.

Option 2: If a hen laying the egg makes it, then the chicken.


Believing in evolution, one specimen of the non-chicken parent in the hierarchy tree created the present day chicken by some genetic mutation.

Coming form the mind of an amateur in Biology and Philosophy.

xoxo

Why My Days are Green? | Part 2

Disclaimer: If you have read the Part 1 and expecting this to be another rant about why Green Day, as a band, is under-appreciated in this world, you are wrong. This time it's only in subtext.

I have been pretty philosophical since childhood. Since the time I didn't know the butterfly effect is an actual phenomenon and a Mathematical theory, I had this entire theory of why I am where I am because my name is Sanjana. If you are not interested please move forward to the next paragraph. Or rather, skip this article entirely, because the rest of the article is also about how I perceive my life. Or, to be fair, life. Kay, thanks. Long before I understood the role of probabilities in shaping our lives, I could see the effect of minute incidents influencing small, and eventually bigger things.

Have you ever seen the influence of something very monotonous, as boring as the colour green? My school uniform was green. My house was painted green. The coaching handed me green sweaters, and my first job the company had a green logo, and in turn, everything.

Summer 2016 was one of the greatest periods of my life. Surely, there were some setbacks, but I was in the heart of Silicon Valley, working with what I had always dreamed of! Again, I didn't perform upto everyone else's expectations.

And today, I went through a lot of old 1-page journals that had my experiences for the inernship and full-time application process. I decided to delete them all and write all those fresh emotions flowing through me in this entry. It hasn't been an easy journey, but am I satisfied with the end result? No. I am not funded by my department anymore, and don't have a full-time job. These are heavy words! But will I put myself down for what I wasn't able to do? Hell, no. There are a lot of people out there who already do that. I will accept the results I have drawn to myself, and push myself to work harder. I have been too crticial about myself and it is time I cut myself some slack.

I have a lot coming up in the next semester! I have my Master's project to complete, I have part-time jobs to work, get my license, exercise, feel like I settled in here, and this I can only do by making sure I am having a good time, and no worrying. Because at the end of the day, things always happen. Sometimes you are satisfied with your performance, sometimes you are not. But this is mutually exclusive to whether or not you are having a good time. So why not have a good time! And after graduation, I am joining the green, and the yellow, and the red, and the blue company! And this is a promise to myself to never be disappointed to not meet someone else's expectations, and work for what I exect from myself. And it's a learnng in progress.

So here is my incoherent presentation of life, as it is in my head right now, as I try to merge into people so foreign to me. Trying small talk, and comprehending the meaning of deep talks all by myself.

Signing off.

From the Soul

The glittering tail of a fallen starlight. A drop of vanishing frozen dew in her hand. And one tale rolling down her cheek.
Lost for words. Again. One thing I have figured out in life - the only time I run out of words is when I stop talking to myself.

Into The New World!

Originally published: 09/20/2015.

Having spent 21 years of your life in one city makes you prone to adventures when you move to another country. And this, my friend, is a reminiscence. A pensieve for me. Only this is not going to be in a locked cupboard in my inaccessible office, but stuck in some branch of the web into which you might accidentally stumble.

So I leave my beautiful city of lakes, to reach the capital. I am confused. I am scared. 

But I'm excited. Very, very excited. 

I wave a good bye to my loved ones, with a heavy heart and a broad smile, I look forward to the very first journey I am going to take all by myself! To explore the world on my own!

I complete the formalities at Delhi airport, take my flight, reach London, and later Philadelphia.

Welcome to the United States of America. 

Hm, so I am done with my immigration and customs, and have 5-hours more before my next flight. The airport looks the same. Weather, can't tell. People are surely different. The food...well let us find that out.

Okay, so I have no idea how things work. I don't know the names of most of these restaurants, and I don't know what to order. I am not even sure how to order.
Well, the name of this salad is written in green, and everything else is in red. I'll get this one. Great way of choosing, right? Wow, an Indian person on the cash counter. Feels good to find a name whose pronunciation I know.

Okay, so I did he transaction correctly. And I am getting the salad with cheddar cheese and cottage cheese on lettuce, tomatoes, and bacon.
Wait, what? BACON?!
Dude! I'm a vegetarian.
Sure, I'll have the bacon removed.

Okay, so I don't think I can survive without garam masala over here. What's the difference between trash and recycle? Great, I don't even know how to get rid of this thing. Nevermind, the coffee is the same everywhere, right. I'll just try to put this really, really long day (literally) behind me. Hm, try not to convert this into Indian currency.

First sip. Oh no, I am too tired and ashamed to ask for sugar. I can have this cappuccino bitter. Yes, I can. Yep. Hm. Maybe not the entire thing. Okay, half of it. Come on, dude, at the least try. One more sip. Okay my flight has been delayed by another hour. Sure, I'll finish the coffee. Or, not. I can not do this. What's the difference between trash and recycle? Great, I don't even know how to get rid of this thing. Nevermind.